National Security Chat Group

Everybody welcome!, BYOB!

TRUMP WORLD'S SCIF OF FOOLS...

It worries me that, out of approximately 320 million Americans, the only non-Trump appointee, the person who was "accidentally" included in the the recent National Security Chat from Hell, was Jeffrey Goldberg, Editor-in-Chief of The Atlantic Magazine. It would be almost impossible to find a more dedicated, intelligent and articulate critic of Trump and his policies... So—again—out of millions of other Americans, why was Mr. Goldberg the only civilian included in the chat? Why not include—for instance—me, or my upstairs neighbor and her pet labradoodle, or the assistant manager of the local DC Taco-Bell, or The Supreme Leader of Iran, or Hillary Clinton’s hairdresser? It could have been anybody, but it was the Editor-in-Chief of The Atlantic Magazine who was deliberately asked to sit in on the this chat.
I think the most likely explanation is that a rogue assistant of one of these “intelligence” chiefs included Goldberg in their frat-boy coffee-klatch to embarrass them all—OR, the reverse: It was some clownish Trumpian plot to set Goldberg up for a charge of espionage.

I watched the Senate Intelligence Committee hearing today, and watched with something approaching amazement as the head of the CIA and the Director of National Intelligence just plain lied when asked if anything classified was discussed during this chat. “Nope,” they said, with straight faces, “We were just chatting about out favorite brand of cat food and trading recipes for rhubarb pie.”

**Here’s my favorite clip from the recording of that secret chat (which was included with my Chinese food delivery):

Pistol Pete (top secret code name of the Secretary of Defense):
"Kay—everybody have on their secret Flash Gordon decoder rings? Good!
So, guys, I know you’re as psyched as I am—I think we’re really gonna kick some Hootie towel-head butt… -Just want to remind you all that this is a really, really big secret chat so don't go blabbing about it to just anybody, Kay?
Oh—before we get started, I want to welcome "JG" to this top-secret chat. I don't know who the fuck he is, or where he's from, but it's all good...
Kay--Bombs away dudes!”